February 19, 2015 by Kambili M.A. Chimalu
I came across this video of a lady interviewing random Nigerians on what they would do if they discovered that their husband/brother was molesting their child. The answers some of them gave nearly caused some sort of atomic explosion in my head. Watch it and weep.
Sexual violence is one of the most horrific acts that can be perpetrated against any human and this act becomes doubly abhorrent when it is perpetrated against a vulnerable and defenseless child. When a child is victimized by a trusted adult, one would expect the child’s guardian to do everything humanly possibly to ensure justice is carried out and some sort of normalcy returned to the child’s life, but it seems that some of our fellow Nigerians do not see it that way.
For starters, some were keen to blame the violation of a child on some demon/evil spirit possessing the adult. That is the biggest load of horse-shit I have heard in awhile. Some Nigerians delight in finding some sort of spiritual connection to everything that happens in their lives. Oh! It was the demon that forced a grown ass man to unzip his pants and molest a child. Oh! It was an evil spirit that forced the grown ass animal to probably muffle the child’s screams as he violated her. These people are keen to blame anything, but the one thing that should be blamed: the animal that raped the child. This is not some evil spirit or demon at work. It is a case of pedophilia, where a grown man, being of sound mind and body and capable of making rational decisions, decides to violate a child.
When asked how they would handle the situation, some of the respondents’ answers made me weep. One recurring answer being that they would not go to the authorities. How else can one handle a sexual predator than by reporting him/her to the authorities? They tried to rationalize this clearly insane position with various arguments.
One man said that it is a “blood” thing, meaning that he would not report his own brother to the police, but would rather report him to the council of elders in his family. What bullshit! What blood connection is thicker than that of parent and child? He followed his answer up by saying that the police can arrest the brother if they catch him doing it to another child. People, this man would prefer his brother get another opportunity to violate and destroy another child’s life, so long as he does not have to break the “blood” they both share by reporting him to the police.
A woman claimed that she would not report her husband to the police because it would mean him going to jail. She was worried about who would take care of the children in the man’s absence. Again, we see the insanity that people try to spew all in a bid to rationalize their inaction. From all indications, the husband is doing a piss poor job of taking care of the child if he is molesting her. This woman thinks it is more important for this man to “financially take care” of her kids, giving him more chances to molest them some more, than to treat him like the animal he is in order to protect her child.
Another woman justified her vomit-inducing stance by claiming that she cannot break her marriage. Is it the marriage that has already been broken by the animal that violated her child that she is trying to protect? According to her, God put her in his life to manage his weakness, so she has a duty to protect her husband. The little detail she keeps missing is that pedophilia and rape are not weaknesses; they are crimes.
One thing one of the women said captured the true essence of the problem of this culture of silence: “Nigerians are taught to cry and clean their eyes.” Now, this is the problem. People are so consumed with looking for the demon to blame, protecting animal-husbands/brothers, or sweeping everything under the rug in order to maintain a front that they overlook the heinous crime that has taken place.
A sexual predator has committed a serious crime by violating a child and stealing her innocence. This child, who has become scarred for life, will spend a long time wondering what she did to cause this traumatic event to happen to her. However, instead of protecting the vulnerable child, it seems more people are interested in protecting the predator.
There is no confusion or dilemma about what the right course of action should be in a situation like that. Any sane human being will know to report the predator to the authorities, who will ensure the predator never sees daylight again. It is our moral responsibility to protect the most vulnerable and defenseless people in our society: children. The day we start protecting the predator instead of the victim is the day our civilization begins to end.